Now, in the past I was…somewhat dense, and even after being in 2-3 relationships prior to this encounter, I still couldn’t tell when a person was flirting with me. So, in that sense, I was as dense as a brick wall. Sometimes I mistook girls trying to get my attention as flirting….and no, I didn’t think I was some sort of Casanova or anything, but I was young(er) and bullheaded. So anyways, I was walking through Grand Central Station, and this girl, who was about my age, maybe a little younger, tapped me on the shoulder. Now I had nowhere to be, so we started talking, and I found out 2 things. One, her name was Elena, and two, man this girl was really interesting! I mean, she could hold a conversation up, and support it with something new or interesting, and I just found myself immersed in the conversation. It wasn’t long before she had to go, and before she left we exchanged numbers. I stayed in New York for around 2 months in the summer with my older cousins, and I ended up going out with this girl. I obviously had to leave, small tears from the both of us, she’s a great friend now…but before I had to board the plane, she told me one thing I would never forget, and that is when we first met, the reason she tapped me on the shoulder was because my shoes were untied, and she didn’t want me to trip.
At-trac-tion, noun – the action or power of evoking interest, pleasure, or liking for someone or something.
Based on this description, one could be attracted to just about anything based on their interests. But, in the way we are using it in this post, you could say that attraction is a sub-form of “love” and is more based on first appearances, in other words, a crush. If you think this? You are pretty much correct. However, attraction can also be something that can reinforce your love for someone as a whole. I’ve felt this before, oh yes I have. It’s a pretty strong feeling, not as strong as actual, genuine love, but it drives you to do some crazy stuff. As such, it’s important to know how to differentiate the two feelings, and how to up your “attractiveness level.”
Attractiveness is basically how you evoke interest in yourself in other people. Ways you can do this? Well, most of the time it’s something that you can’t really control per-say, it’s more of something that you can guide. You can use a whole bunch of make-up and stuff yeah, but then you would just be really….well fake. I mean, I wouldn’t want a girl who caked her face in make-up everyday just to impress me. I’d rather have someone who can just be themselves, and that’s number 1. Just be yourself. Dress the way you want. Walk weird, talk weird, live the way you want to, just be…you. In the end, if the person is attracted to you for you, then you’re one lucky person.
Something else I want to address, cologne, body spray/deodorant, and perfume. Please, I like a lady that smells nice, and ladies; you probably like a guy who smells good too, but for the love of GOD please do not douse yourselves in your chosen scent of choice. There’s only so much passion fruit-whatever that I can take. Keep it small ya know? Just do one little spray on your wrist, and one on your collarbone. That’s all you need. Gentlemen, please do not use Old Spice or any other brand of deodorant to mask yourselves when you don’t shower. That’s what cologne is for, and even then, you shouldn’t need to use it in the morning…just get up a little earlier and take a shower.
Now, for all you gentlemen out there who want to look simply strapping for your lady of choice, I have some advice for you regarding colors. Now, first and foremost, black goes with everything. That’s pretty obvious, it’s also slimming. So get some black clothing in your wardrobe fellas. It isn’t that hard, just go out and buy some plain black t-shirts. It’ll change your world, you can dress so simply. For example, one could wear a plain black shirt with a pair of khaki shorts and maybe sandals. The reason for this is, when you wear black, it naturally sucks in all of the light, so peoples eyes naturally navigate towards articles of clothing, or just about anything brighter, which may lead them to your shorts, or maybe your face. This is why it is so important to have a few of these in your inventory, because they highlight your other clothing items. Also, learn to accessorize a little bit, nothing’s wrong with it. For instance, if you have a religion, get a necklace for it, I’m Buddhist and I have a wooden beaded necklace. I also have a shark tooth necklace. I’ve seen many different necklaces, some or chained, while others are hand carved beads through string, all representing different religions. Be proud man, I’m not exactly the most religious of a person, but I know faith and pride when I see it. Oh, and wearing earrings, uh, ladies, you all know what you’re doing here, same with the accessories. But gentlemen, please, for the love of god, either get your left ear pierced, or get both pierced. Don’t go right ear, there’s an old saying that goes for that, and it goes “Left ear Buccaneer, Right ear Queer.” But if you want to get your right ear pierced, go right ahead man, I can’t stop you. Just uh…try not to get gauges, they’re cool and all..but they freak some people out…a.k.a.me.>.>)
Regarding first impressions, like I said, just be yourself and it should go just fine. However, try not to come across as too friendly, or plain rude, as that’s a turnoff for many guys and gals like myself. Well, unless that’s just you, then well…just do it I guess. The best way to start a conversation is by asking about things of common interest, music, hobbies, and other things like them. Find things that you share that they really enjoy talking about, because it’s always fun to me personally, just watching someone ramble on about what they love…it’s cute. I like to play a small game that’s pretty much like twenty questions. Just get to know the person, that’s all you have to do. I’m not guaranteeing you a date or anything, but the better you know them, the better you get along, and so on.
So, I believe that’s all you need to learn from me. So, take this advice, and the advice from others, and go out and have some fun! Meet some new people, I guarantee that you’ll meet people that will accept you for who you are, and perhaps, you’ll even find someone that you can one day fall in love with. 😀
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